Resources

Book Resources:

• Appelbaum, M. (2009). How to handle hard-to-handle parents. Thousand Oaks, Calif.: Corwin Press.
• Armstrong, D. (1995). Power and partnership in education: parents, children, and special educational needs. London: Routledge.
• Bender, Y. (2005). The tactful teacher: effective communication with parents, colleagues, and administrators. White River Junction, VT: Nomad Press.
• Fitzgerald, D. (2004). Parent partnership in the early years. London: Continuum.
• Kitchen, B. (2003). It's your first year teaching, but you don't have to act like it. Lanham, Md.: ScarecrowEducation.
• Kroth, R. L., & Edge, D. (1997). Strategies for communicating with parents and families of exceptional children (3rd ed.). Denver: Love Pub. Co..
• Lightfoot, S. (2003). The essential conversation: what parents and teachers need to learn about each other. New York: Random House.
• Rief, S. F., & Heimburge, J. A. (2006). Increasing Home-School Collaboration and Parent Involvement. How to reach and teach all children in the inclusive classroom: practical strategies, lessons, and activities (2nd ed., pp. 161-172). San Francisco: Jossey-Bass.
• Sharma, R. (2008). Effective teacher-parent communication. Jaipur, India: Book Enclave.
• Tingley, S. C. (2006). How to handle difficult parents: a teacher's survival guide. Fort Collins, Colo.: Cottonwood Press.
• Williams, R., & Pritchard, C. (2006). Breaking the cycle of educational alienation a multi-professional approach. Maidenhead, England: Open University Press.

Web Resources:

• 2010's American Family Defined - YouTube. (n.d.). YouTube. Retrieved November 23, 2012, from http://www.youtube.com/watch?feature=player_embedded&v=9RMVIO4nmPc
• Barriers to Parent Involvement: Roadblocks and Detours. (n.d.). njpirc. Retrieved November 23, 2012, from www.njpirc.org/documents/resourcesEducatorsParentInvolvement/Roadblocks%20and%20Detours.pdf
• Blank Classroom Newsletter - Free Printable Graphic Organizer for Students and Teachers. (n.d.). Student Handouts |  Free K-12 Educational Materials for Teachers & Students. Retrieved November 23, 2012, from http://www.studenthandouts.com/Assortment-01/Graphic-Organizers/Blank-Classroom-Newsletter-Directions.html
• Clip & Save Checklist: Back-to-School Night | Scholastic.com. (n.d.). Scholastic, Helping Children Around the World to Read and Learn | Scholastic.com. Retrieved November 23, 2012, from http://www.scholastic.com/teachers/article/clip-save-checklist-back-school-night
• Conference reminder and teacher-to-parent questionnaire - Templates - Office.com. (n.d.). Office - Office.com. Retrieved November 23, 2012, from http://office.microsoft.com/en-us/templates/conference-reminder-and-teacher-to-parent-questionnaire-TC101885972.aspx
• Corkboard Connections: Class Handbook Freebie to Customize!. (n.d.). Corkboard Connections. Retrieved November 23, 2012, from http://corkboardconnections.blogspot.com/2012/07/class-handbook-freebie-to-customize.html
• Creating a Classroom Newsletter Blog - YouTube. (n.d.). YouTube. Retrieved November 23, 2012, from http://www.youtube.com/watch?feature=player_embedded&v=FUofIcd-hKU
• Education World: Family Information Form Template . (n.d.). Education World: The Educator's Best Friend. Retrieved November 23, 2012, from http://www.educationworld.com/tools_templates/student_info.doc
• Education World: Good News Postcard 3 Template . (n.d.). Education World: The Educator's Best Friend. Retrieved November 23, 2012, from http://www.educationworld.com/tools_templates/template_good_news2b.doc
• Education World: Parent/Teacher Conference Record Template . (n.d.). Education World: The Educator's Best Friend. Retrieved November 23, 2012, from http://www.educationworld.com/tools_templates/RecordOfConference.doc
• Education World: Parental Concern Checklist Template . (n.d.). Education World: The Educator's Best Friend. Retrieved November 23, 2012, from http://www.educationworld.com/tools_templates/ParentalConcern.doc
• Education World: Positive Action Card Template . (n.d.). Education World: The Educator's Best Friend. Retrieved November 23, 2012, from http://www.educationworld.com/tools_templates/TipOfTheHat.doc
• Education World: Student Profile Form Template . (n.d.). Education World: The Educator's Best Friend. Retrieved November 23, 2012, from http://www.educationworld.com/tools_templates/student_profile.doc
• Education World: Teacher Tools & Templates - Venn Diagram . (n.d.). Education World: The Educator's Best Friend. Retrieved November 23, 2012, from http://www.educationworld.com/tools_templates/index.shtml#parent
• Education World: Welcome Letter Template . (n.d.). Education World: The Educator's Best Friend. Retrieved November 23, 2012, from http://www.educationworld.com/tools_templates/welcome_letter.doc
• Forming parent teacher relationships - YouTube. (n.d.). YouTube. Retrieved November 23, 2012, from http://www.youtube.com/watch?feature=player_embedded&v=bWsI3bpuDfk
• Grade. (n.d.). The Parent-Teacher Conference: 5 Must-Ask Questions (Slideshow Page 1)  - FamilyEducation.com. School Resources & Educational Help By Grade & Subject For Parents   - FamilyEducation.com. Retrieved November 23, 2012, from http://school.familyeducation.com/slideshow/parents-and-school/38586.html?page=1&detoured=1
• How to Be a Good Listener : Good Listeners: Active Listening - YouTube. (n.d.). YouTube. Retrieved November 23, 2012, from http://www.youtube.com/watch?feature=player_embedded&v=tO68uTk-T_E
• Ideas for Parent Teacher Conferences, Open House, and Parent Communications | Product Detail | Scholastic Printables. (n.d.). Printables - 15,000+ Resources & Printable Worksheets from Scholastic. Retrieved November 23, 2012, from http://printables.scholastic.com/printables/detail/?id=28499&No=0&Ntt=Parent-Teacher+Communications&query=Parent-Teacher+Communications&Ntk=Printables_SI&N=0&Nty=0&_N=fff
• McIntosh, P. (n.d.). White Privilege: Unpacking the Invisible Knapsack « Kasama.  Kasama. Retrieved November 23, 2012, from http://kasamaproject.org/2012/03/25/white-privilege-unpacking-the-invisible-knapsack/
• Mr. Smith's  Simple School/Class Newsletter (Black & White Version 8) Printable. (n.d.). Classroom Websites - Whiteboard Resources - Math Facts Testing - Printable Newsletters & More... AmazingClassroom.com. Retrieved November 23, 2012, from http://www.amazingclassroom.com/newsletters/newsletter_8.asp
• Parent teacher conferences - How to have productive meetings - YouTube. (n.d.). YouTube. Retrieved November 23, 2012, from http://www.youtube.com/watch?feature=player_embedded&v=zWPwC-HboiU
• Parent-Teacher Conference Thank-You Printable (Pre-K - 12th Grade)   - TeacherVision.com. (n.d.). Teacher Lesson Plans, Printables & Worksheets by Grade or Subject  - TeacherVision.com. Retrieved November 23, 2012, from http://www.teachervision.fen.com/tv/printables/ConferenceThanks.pdf
• Parent-Teacher Conference Thank-You Printable (Pre-K - 12th Grade)   - TeacherVision.com. (n.d.). Teacher Lesson Plans, Printables & Worksheets by Grade or Subject  - TeacherVision.com. Retrieved November 23, 2012, from http://www.teachervision.fen.com/tv/printables/ConferenceThanks.pdf
• Parent-Teacher Conference Tip Sheets for Principals, Teachers, and Parents / Browse Our Publications / Publications & Resources / HFRP - Harvard Family Research Project. (n.d.). HFRP Home / HFRP - Harvard Family Research Project. Retrieved November 23, 2012, from http://www.hfrp.org/publications-resources/browse-our-publications/parent-teacher-conference-tip-sheets-for-principals-teachers-and-parents
• Parent-Teacher Partnership. Going to School . Education | PBS Parents. (n.d.). PBS: Public Broadcasting Service. Retrieved November 23, 2012, from http://www.pbs.org/parents/education/going-to-school/parent-involvement/parent-teacher-partnership/
• Self-Assessment: The Riley Guide. (n.d.). How to Job Search, Explore Careers and Get Educated | Riley Guide. Retrieved November 23, 2012, from http://www.rileyguide.com/assess.html
• Student Self Evaluation for Report Cards or Conferences - Freebie! - Growing Firsties Lisa Mattes - TeachersPayTeachers.com. (n.d.). TeachersPayTeachers.com - An Open Marketplace for Original Lesson Plans and Other Teaching Resources. Retrieved November 23, 2012, from http://www.teacherspayteachers.com/Product/Student-Self-Evaluation-for-Report-Cards-or-Conferences-Freebie
• The ABCs of Parent Involvement - YouTube. (n.d.). YouTube. Retrieved November 23, 2012, from http://www.youtube.com/watch?feature=player_embedded&v=NvQSGvtmuTI
• The Changing American Family - New York Times. (n.d.). The New York Times - Breaking News, World News & Multimedia. Retrieved November 23, 2012, from http://www.nytimes.com/2001/05/18/opinion/the-changing-american-family.html
• The Decline of Marriage And Rise of New Families | Pew Social & Demographic Trends. (n.d.). Pew Social & Demographic Trends - Public Opinion Polling, Survey Research, & Demographic Data Analysis. Retrieved November 23, 2012, from http://www.pewsocialtrends.org/2010/11/18/the-decline-of-marriage-and-rise-of-new-families/
• Using Google Sites to Create a Classroom Website: Lesson 1: Setting Up Website - YouTube. (n.d.). YouTube. Retrieved November 23, 2012, from http://www.youtube.com/watch?feature=player_embedded&v=tp8chWbRqtA
• WordDraw.com - Free Classroom Newsletter Template. (n.d.). WordDraw.com - Free Newsletter Templates for Microsoft Word. Retrieved November 23, 2012, from http://www.worddraw.com/classroom-newsletter-template.html
•  . (n.d.). 9 Techniques for Building Solid Parent-Teacher Relationships | Scholastic.com. Scholastic, Helping Children Around the World to Read and Learn | Scholastic.com. Retrieved November 23, 2012, from http://www.scholastic.com/teachers/article/9-techniques-building-solid-parent-teacher-relationships
•  . (n.d.). Year-Long Plan for Maintaining Good Parent-Teacher Communication | Scholastic.com. Scholastic, Helping Children Around the World to Read and Learn | Scholastic.com. Retrieved November 23, 2012, from http://www.scholastic.com/teachers/article/year-long-plan-maintaining-good-parent-teacher-communication
•  . (n.d.). Involving Students in Parent-Teacher Conferences | Scholastic.com. Scholastic, Helping Children Around the World to Read and Learn | Scholastic.com. Retrieved November 23, 2012, from http://www.scholastic.com/teachers/article/involving-students-parent-teacher-conferences
•  . (n.d.). Communicating With Parents in Pictures | Scholastic.com. Scholastic, Helping Children Around the World to Read and Learn | Scholastic.com. Retrieved November 23, 2012, from http://www.scholastic.com/teachers/article/communicating-parents-pictures

Classroom Newsletters

Class newsletters are a good way to keep parents informed about events in the school and in the lives of their children.  Keep them short.  Include the names of students (make sure to rotate names to ensure every student gets their name mentioned in the newsletter).  Use a personal approach using words like 'we' and 'our'.  Tell parents what students are learning.  The newsletter is a good way to tell parents highlights about what students are learning.  Include a section with tips for how parents can help their children; it could be tips for completing homework.  The goal of the newsletter is to open the doors of communication so that parents will want to come to school and work together as a partnership.  If your school is in an area in which it impossible to have our newsletter be paperless, then my all means, go paperless and sen it via email.  There should be a class newsletter sent home every week (usually at the beginning of the week) containing information about what the students will be doing that week, what's due and when it's due, any special events, and any other pertinent information.

Example of a classroom newsletter

Here is a simple classroom weekly newsletter template: Classroom Newsletter.
Here is another example of a weekly classroom newsletter template: Classroom Newsletter Template 2.
Here is an example of a monthly reflection newsletter: Monthly Classroom Newsletter Reflection

Here is a video about how to create a classroom blog where you can post your classroom newsletters:

Here is a link to a GREAT website FULL of different templates and forms, there are many classroom monthly newsletter templates and calendars: Education Templates Galore!

Back to School Night/Open House/Parent Group Meetings

Parent group meetings (usually held at the beginning of the school year) are an excellent way to convey information to parents.  Back to School Night/Open House is a time when parents come to meet you and learn about your class.  Here is an Open House invitation/reminder to send home to parents: Open House Reminder and Invitation.  This process can be nerve wracking as you want to make a good first impression with the families of your students and you want the parents to leave the Open House feeling confident in your abilities.  The key to success with Open Houses (and almost everything in education!) is preparation.  Always have handouts for parents to take home; most parents will enjoy listening to you but they’ll appreciate even more leaving with something they can take home and read at their leisure.  Handouts could include a brief overview of your class, classroom management techniques you use, classroom handbook, contact information, information about you, vocabulary and spelling lists for the year, etc. 

If a parent asks a question that challenges you, you are uncomfortable with, or you don’t know the answer to politely inform that parent that you would be happy to speak with him/her immediately after the session is over.  Don’t ever allow anyone to force you into answering something you’re not prepared for or don’t want to handle…talk in private when you are ready to answer!

It’s Your First Year Teaching, But, You Don’t Have to Act Like It (Ch. 18)

Here are some tips for parent group meetings:

1. Classroom policies, procedures, and techniques.  Early in the school year the teacher meets with parents to explain policies and procedures (classroom handbook, transportation, early dismissals, etc.).  Encourage parents to use name tags so teachers and parents can identify each other.
2. Grading procedures.  Explain the method you will be using to evaluate children and report to parents.  Discuss conferences and what they can expect in the conference and how they can prepare for it.
3. Active participation.  Encourage parent questions and comments.  Encourage them to be a part of your classroom and the students' education.
4. Introduction of specialists.  You may want to introduce as many specialists to the parents as possible to provide the parents with information who is available for assistance and to recognize the supporting personnel.
5. Related outside agencies.  Offer information about community services such as guidance centers, mental health centers, and family service centers that might provide support to children and their families.

Basically, you want to cover general school guidelines set out in the school handbook, but more specifically you want to cover your own classroom handbook together.  A parent group meeting does not only have to take place at the beginning of the school year, perhaps it would also be beneficial to offer parent group meetings at intervals over the school year to keep in touch and allow for open communication.

Here is a great checklist on how and when to prepare for Back to School Night: Scholastic Back to School Night Checklist

Here is an article for teachers and parents about how to prepare for Open House/Back to School Night: Reading Rockets Back to School Night.

Reporting Progress

There are many ways beyond the regular quarterly report cards to communicate with parents about their child's achievements or concerns you may have.  

Phone calls from school typically strike fear in the hearts of parents.  Almost always there is a message of something negative, such as unacceptable behavior on the child's part.  But, why don't parents get called when their child does something positive?!  It may be different (almost awkward) for parents (and teachers!) at first to have a conversation about a positive incident at school, but it will assist in creating a positive and safe relationship with students' families if teachers would either call home with positive news once in awhile or snap a quick picture of the student doing something great at school and email the parents with a quick note and the picture.  Here is a great article about communicating with parents through pictures: Communicating with Parents Through Pictures.  It only takes minutes to make these type of phone calls, but the effects are often long lasting.  Be positive and encouraging!  Also, if you receive a phone call from a parent, always return a parents phone call within 24 hours and be prepared to answer their questions (you may want to have the physical copies of the materials you need in front of you to reference during the phone conversation).  You can record your phone calls in a form like this: Phone Record, to ensure you are contacting every family and to recall when you last contacted them.

Snap pictures of students engaging in their work or doing other great things at school and email the pictures to parents with a quick note of praise.

In addition many schools now have reward programs (merit achievement award system) in place where students earn school 'dollars' by being caught doing something positive (usually in regards to the schools specific pillars of behavior).  A small certificate with what the student was caught doing (i.e. 'Your student' was caught being kind) is sent home to the family.
Teachers could also ask students to create notes to their parents on their academic/social achievements.  The teacher can save the notes for conferences, give the notes to the parents, and ask the parents in return to write back to their child to reinforce the child's growth.  Teachers can also mail notes home to parents about their child's progress at school.  Here is a template for mailing parents: Good News Template, and another: Tip of the Hat Good News Template.
Some teachers video tape messages for parents.  This way parents can see the teacher present information and discuss student progress.  This also provides a permanent record for both the teacher and the parents on the child's growth.  *Be aware of families abilities/access to the technology to view videos!

Basically, try to show examples of what children can DO rather than pointing out their deficits.  All too often their weaknesses have been highlighted.  And remember, there are ways around language barriers!  If you cannot speak the same language as the parents, either find someone who can and have them translate your emails or make phone calls with you.  You could also create a system or telephone tree where bilingual parents contact other parents who are not fluent in English to tell them about events occurring in the school and inviting them.

Creating a Classroom Handbook

Most parents are interested in their child's school life.  In response to this, many schools are developing classroom and school handbooks, brochures, policies and procedure manuals, class and program schedules, calendars, computer information networks, videotapes, and other products to assist parents with the wide range of information needed to help them with their child's education.  A real problem between school and home communication is that the school does not often take into account the parents reading level and native language.  Also, different parents need different communications specific to their child (i.e. a teacher would not want to send a communication to all families that only concerns the families of students with disabilities).  Parents of children with disabilities may need information that is specific to a situation.  Teachers can provide a real service by preparing specific handouts for parents of children in their classrooms.

An example of a classroom handbook cover page

Preparing a Handbook:
The classroom handbook is one of the  most important communication tools for teachers.  Handbooks should be short, attractive, inclusive, and well written at a level (and offered in different languages) the parents can understand.  If possible, offer the parents access to the handbook online (see creating a classroom website video below) and in physical form.  It is also beneficial to develop a completely separate handbook for parents of students with disabilities that addresses issues that are specific only to them (this can be created in partnership with the special education team at your school).  Do not duplicate information that is already in the school handbook, this should be more specific to your classroom.  Here are some things to be considered as you prepare your classroom handbook:

1. Special personnel. Include the names and phone numbers of school personnel the parents may need to contact (principal, teacher, counselor, nurse, etc.).  You might also include office hours and best times to call and how to make an appointment.
2. Classroom procedures.  Any technique unique to the classroom should be emphasized (the use of material rewards, time-outs, early dismissal time, etc.)  The fewer surprises that parents have, the smoother the year will go.  Also include any special testing forms or field trip request forms that are different from the general school forms. Daily class schedule.
3. Classroom materials and supplies.  Teachers often call upon parents to provide materials.  Offer a material list that parents are to provide at the beginning and throughout the school year.
4. Transportation. Parents should be informed of the bus schedule and special rules and regulations required for transportation.
5. Conference and reporting system.  The schedule for parent-teacher conferences and how parents can arrange for special conferences should be given.  If report cards are used, parents should be informed of the type of card and when they can expect to receive it.  Also, suggestions or parent tips for parent-teacher conferences should be offered.
6. Additional information.  Tips for parents on managing behavior.  List of agencies that parents can contact for special services or books they might want to read.  Prices of lunch programs.  Educational opportunities (free zoo day, online educational resources, etc.) And, anything else you deem important for parents of your students to know.

Here is an example of a 2nd grade classroom handbook: Second Grade Handbook
Here is an example of a 1st grade classroom webpage: First Grade Webpage
Here are some suggestions on what to include in your classroom handbook: Classroom Handbook Suggestions and Templates

Video on how to create a google based classroom website (great way to place the classroom handbook in parents hands anywhere they go...be aware that not all parents will have the same access to the technology necessary to view your website!)-

Parent Teacher Conferences

      Parent conferences- The  main purpose of any parent-teacher conference is to facilitate the child's educational growth.  Typically, a teacher and parents meet occasionally to share information about the child’s progress.  If the child has a disability, however, more frequent meetings are essential for the child’s welfare.  Conferences held before or early on in the school year can reduce the need for later problem-solving conferences.  The first conference of the school year also allows the teacher to receive information from parents and to get acquainted in a nonthreatening situation.  

Cumulative records- A cumulative record folder is available to teachers on every child who has been in school.  It contains a great deal of information (REMEMBER that parents may or may not know all of the information in the file, do not assume that they do or that they remember everything they have been informed of).  In order to prepare for the initial conference most teachers want to review the available information about the child and family.  Although, some teachers prefer not to read a student’s record prior to meeting them because they fear the information will cause them to create a bias.  This is unfortunate because the earlier a problem is identified for a student; the better the chances are that the problem can be addressed in a successful manner.  It is also beneficial to know what is in student’s schools records because parents have a legal right to know what is in their child’s records, and you will be better prepared to answer any questions that might come up in conferences in reference to a child’s school record.  Teachers should be well informed in at least these four areas about each student: the child’s social, academic, intellectual, and physical growth and development. Students' cumulative records will also contain information about their academic achievement.  Through analyzing students previous assessment marks you are better equipped to answer questions for the parents that they may have, but, through this same analysis there may be questions that will arise such as "Why did this student read at grade level every school year except last year?" 

Social History- A teacher should find out as much as possible about each students family.  It is beneficial to be knowledgeable of each students living situation; for instance, does the student live with both parents, do both parents work, does the student live with other family members, etc.  This type of information will help to arrange conferences so the parents can attend.  Students' cumulative school records may also contain information about students’ social history; are they interested in sports?  Are they involved in any clubs?  Have they had problems with certain students in the past?  At this point, the teacher is trying to understand each student; the teacher should not be trying to draw conclusions as to why a student may be acting the way they are.  The teacher is also trying to find out how to best conduct the forthcoming conference.

Regularly Scheduled Conferences:

This is the "bread and butter" of parent-teacher interactions.  While not all parents become involved with parent -teacher conferences, it is required by state and federal law to have them written into local school policy.  Because conferencing is not generally required as a part of teacher education programs, teachers may have to work on it after they are on the job.  Videotaping oneself and reviewing the tape can be helpful.  More recently, student-led conferences in which the student takes the responsibility for sharing with the parents and teacher the goals and objectives of the program are more common.  Students are present to help set goals and give feedback.  This represents a change in attitude over the last 20 years.  If the student does not attend the conference, sharing major points of discussion with the child later is a good idea.  Here is a link to a PowerPoint presentation regarding student-led conferences: Student Led Conferences, and here is an article about how to involve students in conferences: Involving Students in Parent-Teacher Conferences.  Remember that 98 percent of conferences go smoothly and are rather enjoyable when the teacher is well prepared (p.118 how to handle difficult parents)!

Student led conference

Pre-Conference: First, the teacher should prepare some type of notification to be sent home.  Some schools may provide a standard form letter; however, the teacher usually has the responsibility for sending the letter and making the follow-up appointment.  Here is a reminder form: Conference Reminder Form.  You could also send home tips for parents to help them prepare for the meeting.  Here is a form that is available in English AND Spanish: English and Spanish Parent Preparation Conference Form, and another: Teacher to Parent Questionnaire and Conference Reminder, and one more: Parental Concern Checklist for Conferences.  Some teachers also send home a form prompting questions from the parents which should be returned prior to the conference in order for the teacher to research and be able to answer their questions.  Here is a parent questionnaire: Pre-Conference Parent Questionnaire. Some teachers also include the students in this process by giving them a graphic organizer based on their grade level about how they feel they are doing in school and any questions, comments, or concerns they may have.  Here is a student questionnaire: Student Self Report Card, and another: Student Self Report Card 2.  Here is another student self assessment form for the upper elementary grades: Upper Elementary Self Report Card.  

The following are some suggestions to do before the actual conference.

1. Prepare: Review child's folder, gather examples of work, gather test results, prepare materials, you might want to have a timer set on silent on your body to alarm you of the end time of the conference so you aren't constantly looking at the clock, dress professionally, you will want to have a basket of toys and coloring books with crayons for children to play with if parents have to bring their children (plan for younger and older siblings!).
2. Plan agenda
3. Arrange environment: Have comfortable seating, eliminate distractions.  Some parents will be intimidated or annoyed if you sit behind your desk while they sit like students in front of you.  Therefore, you may want to meet with them at a table to show them that you are all on the same side.

The bad and the good!  Conduct conferences in a warm, safe, and comfortable environment.

A classroom set-up for conferences: student folders, handouts, sign-in sheet, student examples of work, and an organized and warm environment.

Another classroom set-up for conferences: treats for parents, tissues, student work ready to show parents, seating next to each other, and again...a warm, organized, and welcoming environment.

Conference: Teachers must establish rapport with parents in a short 15 minute conference.  This is not easy to do!  It may help to meet the parents at the classroom door (if you are having the conferences in the classroom) and shake hands.  Provide positive anecdotes or mention something special about the student to break the ice.  Establish guidelines with the parents (or which ever guardian is present) at the beginning of the conference, such as how much time you will have together.  It is up to you whether or not you will take notes during the conference.  Note-taking was already covered earlier, but it can be controversial.  Some people think it detracts from the conference, but many professionals take notes as they work (doctors, lawyers. etc.) to record and remember the important points.  If you do plan on taking notes it may be beneficial to explain to parents before the conference why you are taking notes and who they will be shared with.  Here is a conference record form if you do choose to take notes: Conference Record Form.  Some teachers prefer to tape record their conferences, but this technique can take hours to sift through to find the key information they need; also, many people are uncomfortable being tape recorded and will not behave naturally or ask questions they really would like to ask.Remember to LISTEN to the parents; this includes watching their body language and eye movements.  It may be beneficial to summarize the meeting at the end to ensure you are all on the same page.  In this way, the teacher is conducting a validity check of what transpired.  Also, another conference may be scheduled at this time.  The following are some suggestions to follow for the conference.

1. Welcome: establish rapport
2. State: Purpose, time limitations, note taking, options for follow-up
3. Encourage: Information sharing, comments, questions, show examples of student progress (work from the beginning of the year and current work).  Here is a 'Glow and Grow' form to inform parents of where their child excels and where they are still growing: Glow and Grow Form.
4. Listen: Pause once in awhile! Look for both verbal and non-verbal cues, questions
5. Summarize (End on a positive note!). 

Bottles of water as a thank you to parents for attending conferences

Another idea for a thank you to parents, a bag of popcorn with a 'Thanks for popping in!' sign.

 Post-Conference: 

1. Review conference
2. Share information with other school personnel, if needed
3. Mark calendar for planned follow-up
4. Share major points of discussion with student 
5. Send a kind reminder to the parents about what was discussed at the conference and what the next step is.  Here is a link to a post-conference form: Post Conference Form.  Here is a more formal form: Formal Post Conference Form. 

Dealing with Aggression:

Occasionally, parents may become hostile or aggressive (this would fall under the 2 percent of conferences that do not go so well!) (p.118).  Despite thorough teacher training, nothing really prepares teachers for working with some of today’s parents.  Teachers need to learn parent management skills as much as they need to learn classroom management skills!  Without such skills, an adversarial relationship between a teacher and a parent can take its toll.  Today, when a student has a problem in school, there’s a much greater chance that the parents will not accept the consequences of their child’s behavior without argument (p.15).  Just as good teachers must develop skills to work with all kinds of students, they must also develop skills to work with all kinds of parents (p.25).

The aggressive/upset parent

 Some tips for dealing with an aggressive parent:

DO...

• listen
• let them vent, they won't listen to you until they have vented
• write down what they say
• when they slow down, ask what else is bothering them
• exhaust the persons list of complaints
• ask them to clarify any specific complaints that are too general
• show the person your list and ask if it is complete
• ask the person for suggestions for solving any of the problems listed
• write down the suggestions
• as much as possible, mirror the persons body posture
• as the person peaks louder, you should speak softer
• keep cool, don't lose your temper 
• be prepared to end the conference if the parent becomes too aggressive or personally insulting 
• agree, and then make your point: "You may have a point.  Now I would like for you to hear my point too, and together we will come up with a solution that works for your child." 
• apologize: "I am so sorry that this is so upsetting.  I have an idea about how it can be worked out.  Why don't we sit down and brainstorm a list of ideas?"
• acknowledge their knowledge: "Mr. Smith, you sure know a lot.  I am so glad you're here today.  We can combine our knowledge and skills and come up with a plan."

DON'T...

• argue
• defend or become defensive
• promise things you can't produce
• own problems that belong to others
• raise your voice
• use sarcasm
• belittle or minimize the problem
• allow a parent to comment on or discuss another student other than their own child 
• take parent criticism personally

Video supporting/preparing students and parents for conferences:

Printable communication sheets about conferences/weekly updates-

Scholastic Printables for Conferences

Conference tip sheets for principals, teachers, and parents-

Conference Tips for Parents, Teachers, and Principals 

Questions for parents to ask at conferences-

Questions Parents Should Ask at Parent Teacher Conferences